It’s hard to believe that just a year ago, I was still a little timid and had no real clue where I was going in life!
Last May, I took the biggest leap ever by following my gut and committing to Sorcerer School, and it is sincerely one of the biggest, most life-changing decisions I have ever made!
Now, at the end of my Sorcerer School experience, I am fully ready to move forward on my journey with confidence, to stand in my power and take on the world with my heart wide open!
Sorcerer School has helped me plant seeds of purpose that I had been holding on to, afraid of what would grow. Now, I am super excited to continue to nourish those seeds and am ready to accept whatever blooms, armed with the tools to handle any challenges that may come my way!
It’s a bittersweet day, though, because I will miss the weekly sessions — some were extremely intense, some were light and fun, and I took away something from every single one.
Jordanna has a raw, insightful, honest approach that helps you get to the heart of where you’re at. It’s truly mind-blowing!
She has created such a safe space within Sorcerer School to explore your own truth and be vulnerable, guiding you in such a way that you work hard to get to the core of your being while being completely loved and supported every step of they way. Jordanna is an extremely gifted teacher and magickal being, and I am so grateful that she believed in me at a time when I was barely functioning.
And I know our journey together is not over!
I have finally found people that understand and accept me… I have finally found my Tribe. Some of them have become friends, and some my gut says I will cross paths with again — all are held in a very special place in my heart.
I want to say to anyone that might be on the fence about Sorcerer School:
Magick is real… And it’s in YOU! Jordanna will help you harness that!
I think we, as a species, tend to complicate our lives because we don’t know what we want. Overthinking and overanalyzing become the norm, causing so much stress and anxiety in our daily lives.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.
The Universe truly does speak to us in extraordinary and unexpected ways. We just have to listen… Listen with the heart instead of the mind. How? By paying attention to how something makes us feel rather than jumping to examine it cognitively.
It’s hard for me to believe that just a short time ago, I was still flustered and confused about what to focus on and which direction to go in.
I had heard my calling over a year ago but insisted on getting my brain too involved and that led me down the rabbit hole.
My ideas became stagnant, and nothing was in flow anymore. I was totally ready to give up, thinking that maybe I was delusional in thinking I was destined for great things or even worthy of it.
But as soon as I let go, ready to give up, things started to clear up again.
That’s because I had stopped ‘thinking’ about it. Once my mind was silenced, my heart was able to hear again, my eyes able to see.
I may not know my exact path, but that’s ok… I am clear on my next step and that’s all I need right now. I will know more when I’m ready to know more.
If you’ve been feeling lost or uncertain in your journey, I invite you to quiet the mind and let your heart lead the way. Ask your heart what truly feels best, and see if your body offers up any clues as well – do you get chills, for instance?
By setting aside the mind for just a bit, you open up space to create more magic – precisely the type of magic that your mind will work with you to build upon when the time is right. That’s a promise!
Even the nicest people can struggle with kindness sometimes, especially if they’re having a bad day.
Especially those moments when someone doesn’t seem ‘worthy’ of kindness…
Sound familiar? When it’s been a rough couple of days or even just a tough few hours, in the heat of the moment it’s easy to be horrible to ‘horrible’ people.
(Notice, horrible is in quotes!)
In the past, when I lived behind my ‘walls’, I usually came across as cold:
• If a stranger said hello, I would ignore them. I wasn’t meaning to be off-putting or make them feel ignored; it was a defense mechanism.
• If someone was rude to me, I would react immediately and almost viciously. It made me feel safe.
I’ve since learned a lot about myself, and about others.
When someone is treating others cruelly, it’s usually because they don’t feel good about themselves and/or they are having a bad day.
And when I reacted in a spiteful way when someone was rude to me, it was not out of pride… It was because I didn’t like myself.
I was subconsciously creating a cycle of negativity by reflecting someone else’s poor behavior back at them.
Now that I am aware of my own behavior and WHY I behaved that way, I find being kind on a regular basis not just easier than always being in ‘fight mode,’ but also healthier, less stressful. Plus, it makes me feel good.
Allowing myself to be present in the moment allows me to respond rather than react.
I recently had an experience at the pharmacy where there was a computer error regarding my prescriptions.
Before figuring out what the problem was, the pharmacist was quick to blame me, going so far as to raise her voice at me. Instead of reacting defensively, I was able to stay present and could see her frustration. I realized I had never seen her behave this way before and that maybe she was having a bad day.
Now, I’m not saying that makes it okay to treat someone badly BUT was she really aware of how she was treating me?
I stayed calm, and it all got figured out. I even wished her a good day with a smile when the transaction was complete.
Before leaving the store, she found me to apologize and to express her appreciation for my patience.
I still have days when I’m triggered.
We all will.
We’re beautifully human.
The next time you’re feeling defensive, ask yourself: what am I afraid of?
Remember that, just like you, everyone has their own story, their own pain, and their own fears.
When we act out of kindness, even when it doesn’t seem earned or deserved, everybody wins.
Feeling ready to dive into your own dose of vulnerability with a deeper sense of wonder and joy? Join us (& Tara) for our LIVE Embrace Your Darkness Challenge, starting February 13, 2017!
Here are just a few things Embracing Your Darkness can do for you:
• Improve relationships and communication
• Strengthen your leadership skills
• Overcome self-sabotage
• Increase authenticity to impact everything from your career to your love life
• Bring together your overly-brilliant mind and your deep feels so they can finally chill out and become one
Join our Embrace Your Darkness Challenge >>
Life has a funny way of getting our attention sometimes and unless we learn to pay attention, we’ll continue to miss these signs until Source has no other choice than to beat us over the head with it… Sometimes literally!
Just like it did with me.
It took developing extreme chronic illness AND near death due to organ failure for me to get the message that I was not living my truth. In fact, I believe that I co-created all of these by not paying attention, by stifling myself and not living the life that I was meant to live.
I talk a lot about how being ill has changed my life because –
- I want to spread awareness of Fibromyalgia, Lupus, and chronic illness in general,
- It can be very lonely and I want others to know they are NOT alone, and
- My story needs to be shared.
I like to compare my story to the movie Maleficent, and how Maleficent’s innocence was stolen when she was betrayed by a human who had taken her wings (my life’s experiences/betrayals, etc.).
She builds her mighty wall of thorns around her Magical Forest, protecting her from the evil humans that dwell on the other side (closing myself off from the rest of the world).
Her heart grows bitter and cold (I settled into a life of hatred & self loathing), and she places a vengeful curse on the newborn baby of the man that betrayed her years earlier (the curse being the illness I co-created with constant negative energies).
But it was her own hateful curse that led her to the realization that she can love and be loved (my near-death experience that led me to open my eyes to truth).
And it was because of that Love that Maleficent was able to find her truth, take back her mighty wings, and reunite with the humans in peace.
Given where I have finally arrived, it’s hard to believe that I was someone who once hid her true self and felt so grossly inadequate for nearly 40 years.
My mind, body and world have changed beyond belief, and I have had the most incredible, surreal, though sometimes very discouraging and scary experiences.
Even if you haven’t experienced it yourself, I’m sure you can agree being chronically ill sucks – BIG TIME!
I don’t know that I can put into words the agony of living this way and yet, it has also been the most magnificent time of my life!
It has taught me that I was not living MY life but living life the way I thought I was ‘supposed’ to.
I’ve since been on this path of self-discovery and spiritual growth.
I’ve been learning to love and accept myself for who I truly am and release old and blocking beliefs. I am one with the Universe, with power and purpose, and I am here to make a difference in the World.
Best of all, I have learned to love and be loved! And that love is infinite.
I am living proof that love CAN heal.
I am not ‘cured’, by any means. I struggle every single day.
BUT every day, it gets a little easier. And I am about to share something that no one else knows about me besides my husband: I was also diagnosed with Dissociative Disorder many moons ago.
I share this with you now because I am no longer afraid of the stigma that comes with living with Dissociative Disorder and because, and more importantly, I feel more connected to my environment, to myself, and to the Universe than I ever have before!
And it’s not due to medications or the countless therapy sessions I’ve had in the past, but because I have learned mindful thinking, how to be present, and how to live naturally… and this is all possible because of self-love.
Need somewhere to start? Here are a few of my favorite tips to loving yourself:
- Don’t compare yourself to others (and don’t swallow the bullshit standards that the media/society tries to shove down our throats).
- Be unapologetically authentic and celebrate your uniqueness!
- Celebrate your achievements no matter how big or small you may think they are.
- Do something just for yourself every day.
- Connect with Nature… Trust me!
We are all brilliant, magical beings! When we learn to love ourselves whole, we unleash our superpowers and can manifest miraculous things.
It is my belief that when we stand in our own power, loving ourselves whole and letting love be our guide, we not only discover our truth and our magic, but we also bring a new consciousness to our families and our communities. As we do all of this, we change society. It all starts from within.
It’s this revelation that has led to my passion to help empower young women to discover their own worth, find their own voice, love themselves whole, and discover their place in the World… And I am so excited to announce this next phase in my journey! As it continues to take shape, remember to honor everything within you, even the stuff that doesn’t feel so good.
Are you experiencing your own ups and downs, feeling unsure of how to navigate the changes and constant challenges in the practicalities of your business & life (let alone the internal feelings, growth, etc.)?
Modern Day Sorcerer is hosting a special, online event happening THIS weekend!
The Embodying the Sorcerer Virtual Retreat is a 6-hour workshop designed to help you:
- Learn how to make smart business decisions using your intuition,
- Deepen your connection to the many forms of guidance available to you,
- Create more flow and magic in your physical reality, and
- Get your business ready to reach the next level.
Through practical exercises, customized guidance, personal attention, and a supportive community, this event is everything you need to get your business in tip-top shape for the new year (even give it that last boost it’s been asking for before the year ends!), and in a way that feels good, easy, and fun.
Click here to sign up for this Virtual Retreat >>
“As you grow more practiced in noticing your triggers, offering yourself kindness and remembering that the power to heal your life is always available in the present moment, the situations that once set you off lose their explosive potential.”
– Martha Beck
Growing pains suck – big time!
Just when you think you have a handle on things, another ‘obstacle’ pops up in your path.
I’m a negative person by nature and lately find myself clinging to frustration and doubt. I’ve been falling back into old habits and beating myself up for gaining back weight I had lost so long ago.
When I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin, the rest of the world seems to crumble down around me.
I thought I had gotten past this kind of thing, becoming pretty good at ‘mindful thinking’.
If I’ve learned anything at all in this growth process, it’s that I gave society and the media MY power by allowing them to dictate how I valued myself.
My entire life I based my worth on my physical appearance, which has manifested into carrying a very heavy emotional weight and a negative perception of myself (like lots of self-doubt).
This emotional weight created several health issues; my body could not heal in such a stressed state.
But in order to grow, we must bear the pain of expanding, stretching and bending to fit our purposeful mold (that we get to create).
And sometimes that means reevaluating old beliefs.
The labels that we place upon ourselves are like seeds planted deep down within our being. And sometimes, there’s a LOT of digging to do before we get to the very core.
Sorcerer School has taught me to find that core – the root cause – and to see it as a blessing in disguise. Every moment is a lesson and every moment is a chance to LET GO and feel peaceful.
Letting go isn’t always about releasing negative energies though; sometimes letting go means leaving old ways behind, and that can be a very scary thing.
This has been the most challenging couple of years of my life.
I’ve had to say goodbye to so much, from hobbies, my job and relationships to beliefs, financial freedom, physical abilities and even my independence… I’ve had to let go of life as I’d always known it.
Even though it has caused a lot of pain, tears and sadness, it has also brought me an extraordinary amount of healing and love on levels I never even knew existed. I am learning that all the holding on in the world can’t save us from what is meant to be and it is in the letting go that we find truth, freedom and healing.
Letting go is a process that requires a deep courage and commitment to the work, AND these shifts, at least for me, take place in different ways.
Sometimes shifts come with pain and it feels like I’ll never get past a certain something but then there are mornings I wake up feeling lighter, like a weight has been lifted. And even though I hadn’t done anything in particular in that moment, I believe the daily work and commitment does its magic, even when we feel we’re wasting our time, and our bodies will shift and release when we are truly ready.
If I were to offer any advice at all in this area, it would be to really allow yourself to feel and see where it takes you.
An example might be an incident that haunts you from your past. When memories and/or feelings of this incident arise, allow yourself to sink into the feeling.
Try and clear your mind of the circumstances, the ‘whys’ and ‘what ifs’ and just concentrate on the feeling of it.
How does it feel in your body? Where do you feel it in your body?
Allow yourself to just feel.
Sinking into the feeling can deepen the shift and the process of release, and it will support you in feeling lighter when you’re on the other side of it.
If/when you come back to something you thought you’d gotten past and understood, don’t beat yourself up!
It’s perfectly normal and only means that there are more layers to be peeled away and deeper truths that you are ready to learn.
It’s all a natural part of the growing process.
Lastly, I totally recommend finding your tribe. For me, having my husband and the Sorcerer School family there to support me and remind why I’m doing this in times of doubt has been such a blessing!